NFL Commissioner Roger Goodell, the man charged with diluting the product to make it more palatable to sell in overseas markets and to wider U.S. demographics will soon announce that the league has hired its first female referee. Despite years of marketing gimmicks used to draw more women viewers – in particular that sillyNational Breast Cancer Awareness Week campaign where teams incorporate pink items into their uniforms – a series of high profile domestic abuse cases have tarnished the league’s image. So in order to address any potential loss of revenue, the multi-billion dollar sports league is about to announce the cynical ploy of adding a woman to the officiating crew which will be followed by a pricey multi-faceted public relations campaign.

Fox Sports is reporting that “NFL hires Sarah Thomas as its first female official according to report”:

The NFL is hiring Sarah Thomas as its first female official, according to multiple media reports.

A source told the Los Angeles Times that the NFL informed current officials that seven men and one woman were selected as new hires for the 2015 season. All of them will have to pass physical exams first.

The news of Thomas’ hiring was first reported by Aaron Wilson of the Baltimore Sun. The league hired the eight new officials because four from the 2014 season decided to retire. Four of the new hires will be considered “floaters” and not assigned to a specific crew.

The NFL has not officially confirmed the new hires and it is unknown if Thomas will be assigned to a permanent crew or not.

The Democrats and the Hillary Clinton 2016 campaign team will be working very hard to try to convince America that the number one job qualification for the presidency this time around is simply having a vagina. The NFL is sending the same message with this hire and it also serves to put an ice bag on that ugly black eye that was delivered courtesy of woman beaters Ray Rice and Greg Hardy last season. The gesture also rings hollow in that an accused rapist, Jameis Winston is by all indications going to be taken first in the NFL draft by the woeful Tampa Bay Buccaneers. There is a rumor that another alleged sexual assault victim may come out against “Famous Jameis” as well. It’s really pretty hard to take Goodell Inc. seriously on being friendly to women with all of this baggage.

The political correctness Nazis will have their knives out after Jacksonville Jaguars defensive lineman Sen’Derrick Marks called a spade a spade by comparing the hiring to the drafting of Michael Sam who is openly gay. Sam was taken late in last year’s draft by the St. Louis Rams but was unable to stick around after the initial praising of the league as being inclusive had passed and is now a contestant onDancing With the Stars. Marks will soon be set upon for his blasphemy although his comments were more along the lines that the Sarah Thomas hire is a publicity stunt and nothing that could be construed as misogynist.

Hell, why not just start hiring all female officiating crews? They can’t be any worse than the half-blind, befuddled, middle-aged male morons who are calling the games now. Besides, if they are appropriately dressed – in tight zebra-striped bikinis- it would sure as hell make men want to watch more football. It could be the key to selling the league abroad as well because as with everything else in this land of star spangled sheep, fascists and moneychangers everything always comes down to the almighty dollar.